It's a Backwards Shirt Kind of Day

So... this morning I woke up like every other day.

Half an hour behind when I should have woken up.

I showered, not rushing. I plucked my eyebrows- again, not rushing.

Then I went through the rest of getting ready.

And then I wonder why I am never on time for work.

RJ and I have to be to work at the same time. His work is 5 minutes away, mine is 15 and today he left before me. That's never a good thing.

So when I finally decided to get moving I could not find anything to wear.

I have this red turtleneck that I absolutely love but it has a small hole in the front of it right around the collar and I haven't worn it for a long while because of the hole.

Well today... I pulled it out of my closet still on the hanger. I investigate this tiny hole and see if I can manage to cover it.

No go.

As I'm going to put it back I see the back...

It looks just like the front.

I'm WEARING said turtleneck as I type this. BACKWARDS. And you better believe no one would ever know the difference. Booyah. (Yes... I just said that.)

Because that is what the last couple of months have been like for me. Improvising, compromising and adjusting; making things work.

I was reading through a middle school friend's blog this morning.

 Love your blog Michal!

She's just come to the realization that she's young and she worries too much about the small stuff and has anxiety over things that are yet to come. She feels like she's trying to grow up too quickly.

I am the exact same way.

I'm too young to worry about who is going to pay for my funeral.

I worry about Global Warming and the hot australians getting fried up.

I worry about putting a roof on our house and how we're going to afford daycare to our unborn children! 

All of this is a true story!

What I've decided today is that I'm too young to worry about these things. After all.. I'll be turning 23 next April.
I'm still plenty young to be ignorant of daycare and should care less about my funeral which hopefully will be in 70+ years.

That is why I'm wearing my shirt backwards today. My small act of rebellion that shows that I'm still young and free to act as immaturely as possible.

I hope everyone has a great Friday.

I know I will. :D

Continue

2012

I have big plans for 2012.

[Relax More & Worry Less]

Be More Optimistic

[Mountain Bike Our Hearts Out]

Not Literally.

[Find New Friends]

Reconnect with Old Ones

[Nurture a New Hobby]

Get Another 4.0

[Love More]

Love Myself More

[Complete the entire Insanity Workout DVDs]

Not Cuss Once Because of It

Budget Better

[Take a REAL Vacation]

Date RJ

[Make sure 2012 is One For the Books]



Continue

The Holidays

Well,
Blogger is being stubborn today and won't let me fix my blog so for now it looks pretty simple. I'll try again tomorrow and see if it'll cooperate.

I feel so grateful for the family that I have and that I was able to spend Thanksgiving and Christmas with both sides of my family. They are both so amazing and I love spending time with them and being apart of such great families.

I'm not sure if I posted about Thanksgiving but everything turned out perfect. I was able to spend some time with my mom, which I had been craving. She helped me clean and cook and prepare Thanksgiving at our house this year. We also finished our fireplace and living room that same week. It was busy and hectic but I wouldn't change anything about it. We ended up on Thanksgiving with RJ and I's families eating dinner together and I enjoyed it immensely.

Christmas was also wonderful. We had lots of family parties throughout December and then spent Christmas Eve with both of our families. We woke up Christmas morning [just a little bit too early] and headed over to the Nestmans to open presents there. RJ, the sneaky bugger got me a new phone, an iPhone that I have been nagging him about for months. Mostly because I wanted better pictures that I could take with my phone. RJ hardly ever gets to surprise me because all of his ideas get ruined so I was especially happy that he was able to surprise me and I had no idea about it until I pulled it out of my stocking. RJ got boring lights for his 4Runner and clothes. I got clothes too, but I enjoy them more than he does. After presents and the most delicious French Toast ever, we headed up to Idaho for the Deters Family Christmas.

                                          [This is my brother dog, Blue. HUGE is an understatement.]
My family was good to us and they waited until we got there to open presents. My family loves Christmas so this was difficult for all of them. I got the cutest little owl creation from my sister that she made. Seriously. Adorable. I've already hung it at the bottom of the stairs.

                                                                 [Cutest Owl Ever]

The most special present of the day came from my mom. She has this framed picture that she's had for about 10 years that has hung in each of our houses throughout the years. It's a beautiful picture of a house with a wrap around porch tucked into a meadow with a little stream running by the house. I've always found something special about this picture. It represents everything I want in my life and also reminds me so much of my family. I have scoured the internet looking for this picture to buy for myself and always harassing my mom and telling her that I will steal the picture while she's on her deathbed, whether she makes it or not.

Well on Christmas morning my mom gave me her picture. It's something I could never accept but on the other hand something that gives me so much hope and inspiration in my life that I would be silly not to accept her gift. It's so much more than the picture that I received. It's such selflessness and parenting at it's finest. My mom was willing to give me something that I have always wanted, but something that she worked hard to buy and hang in her home. I'll never forget this Christmas and the selflessness that all of my family showed. As we get older Christmas hasn't had the magic touch that it has had in the past but Sunday was the exception. Everyone in my family put thought and love into their gifts and I loved spending time with them. I'm happy to call them mine.

[We went shooting. It was a blast. I haven't been for soooo long]

Continue

One Smart Cookie

Who has two thumbs and got a 4.0 my first semester of college????

THIS GIRL! 

I'm pretty excited about it! :D

Continue

Windmeggedon

So last Thursday we had quite the night with wind blowing up to 100 MPH. It was actually pretty terrifying and I kept thinking that our house was going to blow down or the windows were just going to shatter.

It was pretty funny actually; RJ didn't sleep a wink the whole night and every time I would roll over because another big gust was hitting us RJ would be sitting there, his eyes wide open, just staring around. It makes me smile just to remember it. He's such a worry-wart.

The next morning we were praying that we had minimal damage to our house and that everything was okay. Luckily, we did manage not to have any problems.

Or so we thought...

We went about our weekend and the neighbor stopped us on Saturday evening and let us know that the metal topper (who really knows what that is called) on our fireplace had curled up a little bit and was letting wind into our house.

We were thinking, so that's what that noise was.

RJ boosted me up onto our roof and I screwed it back in. While we were up there we noticed that the corner of our house was completely void of shingles.

So we headed over to Lowes and bought a little bag of shingles and totally ghetto rigged it so that there wasn't anymore bare wood.

We're planning on replacing the roof next summer so we weren't too worried now.

Here is the picture of RJ being the handy man he is.

He fixed the corner. I on the other hand barked out orders and caution from the middle of the roof where I wasn't going to fall off. I have the hardest time watching people get close to the edges and especially when the when was blowing and it was starting to snow.

Especially when it's my husband who thinks it's funny to scare me to death.

This was my look the entire time I was up there.

I didn't like it one bit.

I like to pretend to be the supportive wife and all that but sheesh, I guess I could have barked orders from the yard. haha. RJ would have loved that.

It was quite and adventure and I love having a husband that is willing to fix things himself and do the work. He's an amazing worker and an amazing husband. He works very hard at his job and then comes home at night and does things that need to be done around the house.

On Sunday, our ward rounded up the willing and went around and helped the neighbors clean up any trees and branches lying around so that if the wind came again on Sunday night it wouldn't create more damage. RJ had his chainsaw whipped out in .04 seconds and was ready to cut down every tree in the neighborhood. He's such a boy at heart.

It was such a great experience to help those around us. I took a bunch of pictures but I'm saving them for a separate post.

Hopefully I'll have it ready tonight. :) 

Continue

I Know I Can, I Think I Can, Maybe I Can...

Lately I have felt motivated to do this.

But afraid that I will look like this.



So being the sane self that I am disregarded the freezing temperatures and signed up for this.

And am feeling like this.

It's on March 17th next Spring and I'm motivated and excited but also terrified at the same time. I did The Other Half Moab marathon a couple of years ago and I would really like to break my personal record and also stay in shape this winter. It's going to be a lot of cold runs and early mornings but I know I can do it and I can't wait!

It's a lottery draw so there is a chance that I won't get picked to participate but if not I'll find another half marathon close to the same date and sign up for that one.

Continue

So Much For Thankfulness

My being thankful posts lasted approximately three posts so I've decided to bag it altogether. I am thankful for many things. If you want to know all of them give me a call. :) 

Don't you love getting a new piece of furniture and it just transforms the whole room and you wondered why you had crummy furniture for so long? Yep. Thank you Ikea. 

My family plus RJ's family is coming for Thanksgiving in less than a week and we are not even close to having our living room finished. It looks and definitely smells like a work shop down there and I am terrified it's going to be that way while we're cutting the turkey. Not extremely happy about this one. 

I will however put up a picture of when it's done and it has a beautiful fireplace and the whole room is painted a beautiful-nondescript-safe-boring beige. I can't wait. 

I  wish that I were craftier. I thought I'd take up crocheting this summer... I got one  line done and now it's collecting dust in my closet. Half the problem is I don't know how to turn the corner and attach a new line to the old line and I just don't have the motivation to Google how to do this. I'd rather buy it. Does that make me a bad person? I really want one of these. 

And for the record she has ginormous hands and I want her hair. It looks so carefree.

This post is useless. But that's how my thoughts have been today. 

Continue

November the 3rd

Today I'm thankful for the material things that I take from granted.

A house and 2 running cars.

I don't think I've kept it quiet that I hated buying a house. I did not want a house for various reasons. I didn't want the commitment and I didn't feel ready to buy a house.

Well... we bought one anyone. RJ being the rational one wanted to get going on a house and not pay rent anymore.

I must be weird in the head, but I didn't want to pay a mortgage, I didn't want fruit trees in the backyard, I didn't want to have to mow the lawn every week!

I wanted to continue renting our condo that had the lawn groomed to perfection once a week, not by me and also when something was broken, we didn't have to fix it.

But the more we make our house a home, and the more work we put into it, it's stolen a little piece of my heart. I do love our house. It's cozy and all ours. I can paint the walls whatever color I want and if I decide one weekend that I don't like the color of the bathroom cabinets, we can paint them. [true story].

I am very grateful for RJ taking the ititiative and finding us a house that fits our needs and will for many years to come. It is special to me and I am very grateful to say that it is ours.

The other thing I appreciate are the cars we drive. We like nice cars. We'll be the first to admit it. And we go through them rapidly. haha. That is a long story.

Living in Idaho in high school I got to drive the truck my dad drove in high school, and it wasn't new to him either. I have many stories about being stranded or out of gas in that truck, but I loved it.

I wanted to drive the truck and I loved waking up every morning in the bitter cold and coaxing it to run. It must be the country side of me.

But now I've traded in rust and pickup trucks for sleek shiny cars which I also love. I don't need to have the nicest car around, but it's nice to have something reliable.

Sometimes we take for granted what we have and I am very grateful for the means to afford both a house and cars. It makes me count my blessings everyday.

This was before we even moved in. It's much more lively now.



Continue

Giving Thanks

It's finally November.

November happens to be my favorite month what with all the holidays coming up and the fall weather.

This week has actually felt like Fall. Walking to my car from school last night I was actually cold.

I loved it!

I love cold weather and coats and jeans and boots.

Ahh... I'm so excited.

In honor of Thanksgiving this month I'm going to post every few days on something that I'm thankful for.

This probably isn't surprising, but the first thing I am thankful for is RJ.

Yesterday marked the 4th year anniversary of the day we first hung out. We'd met before but I guess you could say it was the beginning for us.

I made a book for him for our wedding and this was the exerpt that relates the day:

November 2, 2009

 days until the wedding: 171

 I love you, I love you, and I love you.

We picked the date today!

April 22, 2010

 It sounds like the perfect day!

I am so excited to be marrying you. Sometimes if feels cheesy and sometimes the wedding 'traditions' are lame but I cannot wait until the day that we are facing each other and I finally get to kiss you as Charise Nestman. I know this is only the first page of my little book, and I've already gotten cheesy, but it is just for you. It is all of my thoughts and feelings on the excitement of getting married to you. One day we'll look back and read through this and find out that we really worried too much about one thing, and not enough about another, but mostly it'll show you how crazy I am about you and all the reasons that you're the guy I am going to be with forever.

Forever.

It seems like a pretty long time. Most days it doesn't seem long enough. I feel like time goes by way too fast and soon we'll be 85 and watching our great grandkids playing. I want to be in love with you every single day until then.

So yesterday was November 1st. This is a pretty good day that I'm going to remember forever. Two years ago it was the day that I met you after I moved down here.

The day that I first had Bubble Tea, which is really gross. We went 4wheeling and I was with you and Nate Rooney. He had really long hair and I fell on my butt when we stopped. I was REALLY embarrassed. I watched Gladiator with you, but we were cuddling, so I was nervous and my heart was racing so I don't really remember watching any of the movie.

You had a beard.

You and your friends had a bet going that you couldn't shave it off until someone kissed you. I didn't want to be the person that did the un-bearding... Maybe that's why I told you I liked it so you wouldn't shave it off. [Even after we did kiss.. a whole month later!] :)

Nick tried to hold Alishia's hand. He'll probably deny that. We broke Gatlin's futon because Nick, DJ, and Alishia were just too fat for the thing. It ended up being really late but I just wasn't ready to go home yet. I pretended to be asleep so that Alishia would go home. She did, eventually. I was happy and apparently lacking all my judgment! You were so cute... You told Alishia I could stay. You would send me home in the morning. I could sleep right there on the futon. She reluctantly agreed. With her gone you were even more cute.. It went a little like this..

RJ: Charise? Do you want to stay here? Do you want this blanket?

Charise: Yeah, sure.

RJ: Are you comfortable? You could sleep in my bed. It's really big.

Charise: Um.. yeah.

Just so you know, I am usually not this.. um.. lacking in judgment! And you were the perfect gentleman. I finally fell asleep an hour later because I was so excited and nervous. We woke up the next morning and I couldn't believe that I just slept in a guy's bed, especially someone so good looking. There was just something about you RJ. I can't describe it. It's like I knew that from the second we met that there was something special about you. Something inside that told me not to let you go. We are nothing alike and yet completely inseparable. I tried to talk myself out of you but I just couldn't. You are the one I want to marry, and I think back to that day and somewhere deep inside I knew that we should be together.

 Love, Charise

So today, mostly I'm thankful for my beautiful husband. He is beautiful; inside and out. He has the best heart and wants everyone to be happy. He cares so much for other people, especially me. He is the perfect husband for me and I wouldn't change one day in the last 4 years. It has been amazing to say the least and I am so happy that I am married to him.



Continue

All Hallows Eve

Don't throw stones yet... before I can explain.
What I'm explaining is quite easy for me. I hate Halloween.

Back up. I love Fall. I love the colors and the cold air. I love the October atmosphere. I almost watched Halloween Town on the Disney Channel last week. (Shh... I said almost!)

But the day of Halloween and the dressing up, not so much.

I am not a dresser-upper. I guess when we have kids I should probably motivate myself to get into the spirit but as of now with RJ and I's childless selves, we're going to Idaho. So my mom can cook me deliciously fattening food like caramel corn. 

Plus I love Idaho's Fall atmosphere. I dream about it at night. I remember the smell randomly and sigh. It brings back lots of fond memories that I like to think about.

What I've been missing lately is picking Pine Nuts. Every Fall we packed into the old Dodge and my step-dad and my mom and the kids would go and pick pine nuts. It's a sticky balancing act mess but so much fun. Then you come home and bake them in the oven. So good. Yesterday I saw an old man on the side of the road selling them in his old beat up pickup truck. I alternated between crying and buying up the lot.

For the record I did neither, but it did make me smile.

So this Halloween there will be no costumes, but we're still going to spend time together and with the family which is one of my favorite things to do.

Continue

Direction

Lately I've been feeling so restless.

Like I need a new direction.

I'm not sure if that means that I should start up a project and invest a lot of time in it and see if that is what I need.
I don't know if it means I should kick up my exercise and exhaust myself that way.

Maybe it means I need to buy a whole new wardrobe. (I'm hoping it's the third)

I have just been feeling a change in the air and I'm not sure what to do yet.
I've been mulling it over and trying to decide what the best thing to do is.

I need some inspiration :)

Hopefully I'll find it soon. 

Continue

Juggling

I'm still trying to get a hold of this juggling business.

Juggling school, work and home life.

I currently have zero clean jeans nor underwear.

I have a test that I have to take on Saturday, that I MUST study for.

Month end for work just got over so I'm feeling a little frazzled.

I know it seems like I say this a lot but whew!

I don't mean to complain.
I love all of the aspects of my life, but seriously if I didn't have to look at the calendar everyday for work, pretty sure I would still be back in August.

I miss photography.

I miss taking pictures and having the time to edit them. I have 3 jobs that I have done that are still sitting in iPhoto, unedited and looking sad.

I need to make time to do that.

I want to work on the house. We have a complete disaster of a living room with boards and sheetrock and carpet, but we haven't had the time to complete it.

Plus our electrician is commuting from Idaho so that limits our work time. :)

Hopefully this weekend we'll start wrapping that up. Our goal is to have it done by Halloween.

RJ cringed and said it might possibly happen, but he's not holding his breath.

But, there's nothing I would change about life.

I might change how many hours of sleep I need a night so that I can get more done, but other than that I am happy.

Happy that I have a home to decorate and a husband that at least washes his own laundry :) [If he does it, the majority that are washed are his. It's a mystery to me why]

I'm happy that I have great family to fill up my time and to keep me laughing.

I'm grateful for a live in brother in law that loads our dishwasher almost every night even though he is just as busy as RJ and I and rarely uses any of the dishes.

I am thankful for my support system. I know I can count on so many people to help me through my stress and also do so much for me.

My mother in law text me yesterday because I wasn't able to make it to Girls Night Out.

This is what she wrote:

"Hi Charise, just wanted you to know that you'll be missed tonight. I'm so proud of you for going back to school. You're a wonderful daughter-in-law who I love very much!"

This makes all of my stress worth it. To know that I am loved and appreciated for what I do. I love my mother-in-law very much and she is so good to RJ and I.

She knew just what to say yesterday to make my entire day. :)

Continue

Mondays, Colds and My Fair Lady

We visited my parents in Idaho this weekend which turned out to be a blast. Of course I didn't bring my camera because I am a total airhead, but we had a great time. My mom cooked a delicious dinner and we celebrated her birthday with old fashioned Pepsi bottles and laughing around the kitchen table. My family makes me laugh so hard and it makes me miss the day to day life living with them. It was quite the weekend. We didn't end up leaving until midnight, arriving home at about 2 in the morning. Well worth the drive though.

This morning I woke up with a raging cold and a scratchy throat which is no fun. I came into work a little late, but I'm here and headed up to school after I get done so that I can continue hopefully getting good grades. I've got a test next week so hopefully I can get some good study time in tonight.

RJ is doing a side job tonight with one of his friends. I think it'll be good to do some manual labor and learn something new. :)

This week is going to be exciting and I am happy that fall is coming. Since my mom's birthday was yesterday, my sister bought all the girls in the family tickets to Hale Theatre's My Fair Lady. Every year we go to A Christmas Carol with the family, but this is going to be really fun with just the girls and going to see a show that I personally really like. I like going and getting a little bit of culture and fine arts in my life, instead of just watching new movies.

We're also putting a fireplace in our house which I'm soooo excited about. We have the fireplace and have some of the work done, but the next step is to put lighting into our living room so my dad is coming this weekend to install that and hopefully by the end of the month we'll have a remodelled living room that is nice and cozy with a fireplace. It's going to be a lot of work, but at least it'll feel like home and be a little bit more updated.

Saturday the family is also carving pumpkins and I'm going to make soup. I love fall and spending time with my family. I am going to anticipate the weekend all week, so hopefully it goes by fast. I'll post pictures up next week of the entire weekend.

Continue

Mom, Mom, Mamma, Ma...

A mother is she who can take the place of all others, but whose place no one else can take.
- Cardinal Mermillod

Today is my mom's birthday. I'm not even sure where to start on this post because there's so much to say. I have so much love and respect for my mom. She is a truly amazing lady and there's just not enough words to express all that I feel towards her. 

I have always wanted to be just like my mom. I remember helping her clean our house when I was four or five with a plastic vacuum. I would follow after her babbling on and on and I loved being close to her. 

I always wanted to be a dancer and a cheerleader just like her. I started gymnastics when I was in fifth grade and she would drive me to practice twice a week and stay the entire time. I know she had so much on her plate, but knowing she was there made me feel so good. She wanted to see me pursue my dreams. She let me bawl on her shoulder when I didn't make the high school drill team. She was there when I made my high school cheer squad. She spent numerous hours being my "hair model" and singing with me in the car. 

She teased me when I had my first kiss.

She was with me when I bought my wedding dress. She saw my face light up when I came out wearing a beautiful dress and told me that I had to buy that one.  

My mom has been such a large part of my life. She has been such a good friend to me and also a good example. She shows me that the only way to accomplish things is through hard work. She also is one of the most giving people I know. She has so much compassion for people and is willing to always go the extra mile to help someone out. 

My mom has been through a lot in her life. She has had many trials that I think she has overcome beautifully. She still has a smile on her face and a laugh nearby. 

Mom, I love you with all of my heart. 

Everyday with you is a blessing and I am proud to be your daughter. 

Thank you for all you have given me and taught me. 

Most of all, I love you. 

Love, Charise  

Continue

I Should Be Asleep, But I'm Listening to RJ Sleep Talk Instead...

RJ talks in his sleep. Non stop. Every night. It's hilarious the things he says. I always try to ask him about it and then he gets upset for teasing him. :) I love it. 

I am wiped out. Between school, work and trying to be a good wifey I am exhausted. In a good way though. I love going to school. I'm so glad that I'm going and I finally just took the plunge and went back. I love work. I love the people I work with and I enjoy going everyday and listening to the Dixie Chicks all day long. Thanks Mary :) 

I also love my husband. More than words can express. But all together these things have got me in quite the frenzy and I'm wondering where I fit into all of this. 

I haven't worked out in... weeks months! 

Scratch that, I did one, count it, ONE P90X workout last week and thought I was doing good, but the next day I was so sore that I wanted to curl up in a ball and die. If it didn't hurt so much. haha. 

I also don't think I've taken the time to fully look at myself in the mirror for a few months either so sorry to those that have to see my ragged ponytail and sub par makeup job everyday. 

But... there is a moral to this whine sesh. 

Even when I think things are stressful.

Even when there's days that I long for hot chocolate and my pajamas at 4 in the afternoon, 

there's always someone I can come home to and make me smile. Someone that will hug me and tell me that he's proud of my ambition. 

Someone that I can drive all the way to Moab and back with and not turn on the radio even one time. We can talk the whole way. 

I love talking to that kid. He makes me laugh, smile, cringe and blush all in one drive's time and I love every second of it. 

And as hard as it seems for me, I know that RJ is feeling it too. I would say he's missing out on home cooked meals but.... he cooks so.. he's well fed. But when he says he misses me at the end of the day I want to cuddle up next to him and whisper in his ear that I can't believe that I have the honor of calling him mine.

So I'm going to do just that.... 

Continue

Autumn

Fall always brings mixed feelings to me.

I love the crisp air and the smell of the air.
I love the warm clothing and getting away with wearing ten layers.

I love the changing leaves and boots.

There's things that I also don't love about fall.

Remember this beautiful couple?

This is my mom and dad.

I love them so much. 

But fall always makes me remember when they weren't so happy in their marriage. 

I moved to Idaho in October 2004 and became a part of this family.

(I'm Facebook stealing pictures)

This is just part of the Montgomery family.

We're been through ups and downs and certainly a lot of great times.

So this is where falls comes in. It always reminds me of feeling torn.

Torn on whose side I should be on, and who I should be happy for.
I'm happy for my parents, but on the other hand, it's so hard leaving behind my adopted family.

It feels so good not to have a broken family, but to be truthful. It's still mending.

Fall brings back all those memories that I hold close to my heart that I try not to let out. I don't want people rationalizing how I feel or how I should be feeling. What I really want is to remember the good times while also moving forward in the best way possible. 

I still get to see and talk to these incredible people, but we no longer get the close relationship that I loved. I no longer get to help feed cows or go on a double date "bunny bashing" with your sister.

The hardest part about divorce and second marriages is your heart grows and is opened up to new family. You embrace your new life with enthusiasm and happiness, but when things don't work out, you have to pretend that those pieces of your heart aren't missing. You have to go on with this patchwork quilt of a heart, with so many little pieces taken out of it.

I love this version of my family so much and they mean more to me than life itself,

but that's just it. Because life isn't always perfect and it's always everchanging, I will always have another version of my family close to my heart.

I am so happy and content in life right now.

It's hard to have any hard feelings about my past because I really do believe that it has made me who I am.

I think the tugging at my heart is supposed to be there. It is telling me that it's okay to hold those memories close to me while also being happy for how life has worked out.

                           Because maybe without going through those experiences, I wouldn't have him.

So maybe I should enjoy fall. It makes me look back and smile and think of all the people that are part of my life for whatever reason they were put there.



Continue

Thanks P-Dub, Now I Need a Farm

So.. I frequently creep http://www.thepioneerwoman.com/ 's blog. I love her attitude about life and how she is so open and friendly on a blog. It's amazing to me that she can seem like you're best friend and you've never even met her. I was reading today about her day to day life and living on a farm. I realize her life can't be great every minute of the day, but she doesn't exude that. She has the best attitude and take on life. I love it. It makes me want to be a better, happier person; along with following my dreams.

I have had to make a lot of decision lately and I want to make the choices now so that I can be an "elect" lady someday.

My dad always wanted us to be "elect women" someday. He also told us we should always have a little sassy-ness like my mom.

Take that as you will.

I love my family and fall and the crisp air. Fall is going to be a good season.

I can feel it :)

Continue

Labor Day Weekend

This weekend was my second oldest sister Kacee's birthday so the family decided to get together at her house in Inkom, Idaho and while we were at it take family pictures. It was a little bit difficult to take the pictures and also be in them but it worked out great and we had a fun time doing it. I will post pictures later, but here is one of my parents. I love it. My grandparents also came up and it was fun to spend time with them and just have a relaxing and fun time. I love going up to Idaho. I love how slow life is and that you can look at all the fields and the farmers working so hard to make a living and to provide for their families and more. My favorite is the smell of them cutting the alphalfa fields. It makes me want to move up there every time. :)

Continue

Never Thought I Was Much of a Stress Eater.... Until Now

I made it through my first week of school and no one was even mean to me!

I was nervous for nothing and I already am loving this semester and my classes. I am happy to be there and I am glad that I did it. It's not nearly as bad as my mind thought it would be.

But,

I think I was mentally struggling with the fact that I was going to get a lot more busy and actually have to make an effort to get good grades and stay on top of things at home, while also quenching RJ's thirst for mountain biking at least a couple of times a week, so last weekend hit and my body decided to EAT and EAT and EAT. Luckily, I caught onto my body's little act of rebellion early on and told myself no,

but seriously... it's so hard wanting to pig out all the time and say no to yummy things that I know if I eat I will be dissapointed later when my jeans no longer fit.

Inside there was a 12 year old boy screaming  for Cheetos and Cheesecake!

I have tried this week to tell him no, but he got the better of me yesterday and I did eat a Mocha Shake from McDonalds... (hanging my head in shame).

So sad.

I thought that school would just be a crimp in my afternoon internet browsing but if I don't start feeling confident in going I'm going to be online shopping  for fat pants!

NOT GOOD AT ALL.

If I start getting enormously big, please tell me to put down the cheeseburger and run a few miles. I might be snippy at first, but I will thank you later. :)

Lots of Love!

-Charise



Continue

Back to school. Back to school, to prove to Dad that I'm not a fool.

Wow, it's been a while. I know I say that at the beginning of every post but if I get out of the habit then it's hard to start going again. But I like to think this is a journal of sorts so here I am.

This week has been really good. I feel like I have accomplished something that I have wanted to do for such a long time. I finally got up the courage to enroll back into college and go. I had my first class last night and I loved every minute of it.

I'm not even going to tell you how terrified I was to go. I'm not sure why I was so nervous but I was walking to class and my palms were sweaty and my heart was racing so when I finally got there and sat down I felt like I'd run a marathon. But after I got settled in I felt fine and I was really happy that I'd taken this step and actually done it.

In the past you could say I was a little bit of a flake. I didn't usually follow through with things and I was always too scared to put myself out there. I feel better now that I've took the initiative to do something that I have wanted to. I know that it's not going to be an easy thing, college for the next 4 years or so, but I know that it's the right thing to do and that I want to do it. I am happy with my decision.

And yes, I did watch Billy Madison in honor of school starting. :)

Continue

Pony Rides

RJ rode a pony! Not bad for a city kid from Vegas :) 

Continue

Swing Life Away

You cannot believe how often I have wanted to blog, but I just haven't had the time to sit down and write one until now. First of all we didn't have internet at our house for the last few months so now that we finally do I think I can manage a little more often.

My whole crazy schedule has been so nice and it has been good to get things done and have a good year that I just can't believe that summer will be gone in just over a month. I'll take you through the events of the last couple months. Pull up a pillow because it could be a while. :)

I think the last time I posted was just before our anniversary. One year you guys! The first year just flew by. It was such a packed year with buying a house and so many new things that I know I couldn't have survived it without RJ. It is so nice to have a best friend that never has to go home. To know that you always have a partner in crime and always have someone to laugh with. Marriage suits us just fine I think. I'm more in love with RJ than when we got married and everyday I grow to admire and love him that much more. He is quite amazing in my opinion and I feel privileged to call him mine. He surprises me with his wisdom and his maturity, but on the other hand he definitely has a sense of humor and sarcasm that leaves my head spinning. I love it. I love him.

I got a promotion at work in the midst of all this and it has been perfect. I love working hard and working hard to solve problems to finally be able to say.. ah ha, and make everything match and work together. It feels good to go to work everyday and I enjoy it. And I think I have finally found what I would like to go into to get my degree so yep, I signed up for school in the fall and while that terrifies me and makes my stomach turn into goo, I think it's just what I need and I can't wait to start. Yesterday at the grocery store I saw all the school supplies and it made me smile from ear to ear. I am so excited. I'm kind of a nerd I guess. haha. It reminds me of when you're little and I can remember on the first day of school it always had a certain smell that I can still remember and it makes me excited. I love the back to school atmosphere.

This summer has been full of mountain biking. As much as I roll my eyes and tell RJ I hate it I really love it deep down. I love knowing that I am making the bike work for me and only my power will propel it. It's an adrenaline rush for sure. It's definitely hard work and it doesn't come extremely easy for me because I'm so scared to go fast downhill haha. I am getting better but I'd much rather climb uphill than go downhill. On Saturday RJ and  a couple of our friends went up to Dog Lake and actually climbed the backside of the mountain. It was a lot of walking to say the least. But it felt so good to be exercising. The way down was pretty fun too. We stopped at the lake at the top and got LEECHES on my feet. They were just little ones that you could peel off but... :S.

Other than that we've been trying to stay busy and still trying to fix things up around the house. We painted our bathroom cabinets last night and just need to put the second coat on. I will put up a picture with the before and afters. :)

I am taking a friends bridal pictures this weekend too and I CANNOT wait. :)

Until Later,
Charise

Continue

Green Thumbs

RJ and I have planted flowers all over our yard in the last couple of weeks. EVERYWHERE. He is a fanatic about flowers. Placement, size, and quantity are only a few of the factors.

We've planted flowers in both of our flower beds in the front & back yard and we planted a few fruits and veggies in our garden too. I am really excited to see these grow.

It makes me feel good to know that we have a place all our own where we can plant flowers and see them bloom next year and the year after and so on. It's nice to feel like we are helping ourselves and providing for ourselves.

I don't have any picutres on this computer but as soon as I do I will put them up!

Happy Summer Everyone :)

Continue

Oh Okay... I'll Tell You

This past weekend I got to take engagement pictures for one of RJ's coworkers and his beautiful fiancee. They brought their kids and we made an afternoon out of it.

I know I'm just a beginner. I know that hard work is what makes dreams become reality.

And lots of practice...

I love taking pictures.

It absorbs my whole life.

I look at picture after picture after picture, envying the emotions they portray and how I can capture that same beauty.

So... here's a few.

I had such a good time. I loved knowing that I got to do what I loved and they got a day to remember.

Congrats Scott & Rachelle :)



Continue

:(

I just deleted a huge post on acccident and now I don't have time to rewrite it.
I'll write again later :)

Continue

Too Cool For School

I am going back to school :)

I am soooo excited. I went for one semester after I graduated high school, but I had to pay out of state tuition and it cost too much so I didn't go back the next semester and was planning to wait until I became a resident of Utah. Well then I got married and life got crazy so I haven't gone back, but now I am ready as I'll ever be.

I'm not going to lie, I'm really really nervous. It's a big commitment and a lot more work than what I'm used to. It's going to be time consuming and stressful at times but I am ready. I'm excited.

It's something that I just want to do. I want to be able to contribute to my family's success and I want to prove to myself that I can do something and follow through and gain the rewards from it.

I'm going to Weber, and to start out with I'm mostly just doing generals. I have two degrees that I wouldn't mind having so after my intial generals are done then I'm going to choose which one to major in. Either Sociology or a Business Administration degree with an emphasis on Finance.

We'll see where the wind blows me but ultimately it is up to me and I'm ready to start learnin. :)

Wish me luck!



Continue

A Lesson Learned

Imagine.. I'm 5 years old. We're at the State Fair. I've got my pink cowgirl boots on and piggy tails in my hair. I've got a smear of cotton candy around my face and the sun is about to go down.

My dad takes me by the hand and urges me toward the front of the line.

We've decided that I'm going to Mutton Bust.

For those of you who do not know what "Mutton Busting" is, you put a small child on the back of a sheep and they hang on for dear life while the sheep runs through a fair arena. The child that hangs on the longest gets the coveted prize, a new bicycle.

I wanted to follow in my older sister's footsteps and make my dad proud. I wanted to win that bicycle.

But I get to the front of the line and I chicken out. I've decided that riding a grimy sheep is not for me. And life goes on.

Now.. I'm 6 years old. We're again at the State Fair. I've now got a purple pair of cowgirl boots and I'm determined to ride that sheep!

We get to the line, and I'm told that I'm too much weight.

WHAT?!

I could not ride because I was 4 pounds too big.

4! Not 28! 4!

And I was devastated. I let myself down. I've never forgotten that day.

So now.. 16 years later. I'm still living the same scenario.

I dread the middle of the month more than any other time.

I just get feeling that we've made it halfway through another month and then the 15th hits...

paying bills day.

In my jaded unexperienced teens I thought that having a job and paying your bills would bring such a sense of accomplishment. I always wanted to be one of those gorgeous housewives that wakes up with a smile on her face, sets herself to work rightaway, and takes the day by storm. At the end of the day she lays by her husband, and she is content with her day's work..

And for all the other days of the month I do feel good. I feel like we're progressing as a couple and we're accomplishing things that I thought would take us longer. I'm proud that we own a house and I'm proud to say that we drive decent cars and we still fit reasonably within our monthly budget.

We'll have owned our house for 1 year on May 28th. That is so exciting to me that we have almost made it through the first year. I'm assuming the first years are the hardest. We had a hard time adjusting to a huge chunk being taken out of our paycheck and we had to adjust to high utility bills and that there's no landlord to call when your washer gives out. (Which would have been so nice 2 weeks into homeownership). I've learned that with great things, comes great responsibility. It's not always easy to give up so much money and sometimes I wonder what we got ourselves into, but then I think about it and I'm happy that we've accomplished what we have. I know that our struggles now will bring rewards later.

But then that middle of the month rolls around and that house suddenly feels like it weights a thousand pounds and it's on my back. I feel like 2 weeks of hardwork and a paycheck just got flushed down the toilet. I realize that it's going towards what we have, but tell that to my hysterical self when I'm just looking at numbers.

It's just like that dusty day at the fair when I was 5 years old. That sheep seemed like a big scary monster that was slobbering all over it's flock mates. It was too scary and I couldn't face it.

It's just like paying bills. They seem scary and insurmountable and so intimidating on paper.

What I didn't realize is that that "scary" sheep was actually more scared of me than I was of it.

I have to learn that paying bills isn't a scary experience. I get through it every month, but then for some reason I'm nervous about it the very next month all over again. I don't want to turn around in 20 years and never have accomplished something because I was too afraid. I don't want to not have a house or start a family because it seemed too scary at the time.

I realize that life may seem big right now and a little intimidating to me. I'm not sure if anyone else feels the urge to sell their house and backpack through Europe forever (meaning, my occupation would be.. a bum) everytime you have to pay bills, but someday I'll look back and know that I worried for nothing. That my family and I are what life is about and houses and cars and running water are all just necessities that shouldn't be made into a big deal.

And just like that fluffy stinky sheep, I should tackle life head on and not be intimidated by it. I never want to feel like I let myself down again, no matter what situation I'm in so I better start being a little more brave.

Continue

Does This Make Me Look Fat?

I am tired today. And I'm not a morning person. I love the morning, but I cannot ever find the strength to drag myself out of bed each day.

Sadly, I'm not a night owl either. So I'm pretty much the dud in the middle.

Anyway.. last night RJ and I are watching the Bachelor. We're making fun and trying to say what they're going to say before they say it. Laughing like crazies.

But we're watching the After the Final Rose ceremony and we're sitting there watching and I'm listening to Emily talk about her relationship with Brad and how hard it is to be away and watch the show.

I don't discount that she has a hard time watching it. I would have a hard time watching him be with other people. But hello.. you're the one with that HUGE ring on your finger and Brad looking lovingly into your eyes at that very second. He obviously wants you.

It kind of opened my eyes. You can see that she has a lot of self doubt and she's insecure.

I am an insecure person. I have the hardest time finding value in myself and what I contribute to the world. I have a hard time seeing my differences as good.

But I try to keep my feelings and emotions in check. I know that they're silly and petty and that there are things in life that matter way more than having all the right clothes and perfect hair.

I notice that when I am feeling down about myself and picking at myself it hurts my relationship with RJ.
And I know I am no expert but I think that Brad and Emily would be easing into this transition easier if she has more confidence in herself and their relationship.

It's comfortable to feel insecure if you've always been that way. It's easier to feel that way than to take the chance and have confidence and speak up more.

But everyone deserves to feel like they have a place in the world and they have a place in their own lives.

Feel good about yourself. It's all about your attitude and your perspective.

Respect yourself enough to know that we're all here for a reason and we're all created differently for a reason. No one person is alike. And that girl or guy that you think has it all, is probably wishing she could change something about themselves too.

That person that you think is out of your league might just be in love with you.

Continue

Boys and Their Pickup Trucks

I know that I talk about RJ a lot on my blog. I know sometimes that it is overwhelmingly mushy. 

However, RJ and I are actually pretty low key independent people. And as with any relationship we have ups and downs. Sometimes RJ drives me absolutely insane. There's days that I want to hurl everything in my reach at him and not feel one ounce of remorse. There's days that he thinks I am crazy and irrational. 

But every night as we sleep next to each other I forget all of the things that I was mad about and can't help but think of all the things that RJ does for me and how he makes me feel.

I love knowing that RJ is behind anything I do 100%. He will listen to me daydream, he'll listen to me rant, and then listen to me cry. He takes it when I'm selfish and he kisses me every time he walks into the door.

I don't have to look far when I need encouragement or motivation. He's always right there, telling me that I can do whatever I set my mind to. 

I never want to live a day not knowing that he loves me. I want him by my side forever. 

Seeing RJ happy makes me so happy that I can't even explain it. I love knowing that he is content and happy and feeling good about life. I am always worried that I'm not doing enough for him or that he's feeling stressed and I have talked too much and he hasn't gotten the chance to vent his feelings.

Which is why I get the best feeling when I hear him out in the garage, rattling and banging his truck and fixing things. 

Then he comes into the house, hands black and a grin spread across his entire face. 

There's no better feeling that I can think of. 

Continue