All Hallows Eve

Don't throw stones yet... before I can explain.
What I'm explaining is quite easy for me. I hate Halloween.

Back up. I love Fall. I love the colors and the cold air. I love the October atmosphere. I almost watched Halloween Town on the Disney Channel last week. (Shh... I said almost!)

But the day of Halloween and the dressing up, not so much.

I am not a dresser-upper. I guess when we have kids I should probably motivate myself to get into the spirit but as of now with RJ and I's childless selves, we're going to Idaho. So my mom can cook me deliciously fattening food like caramel corn. 

Plus I love Idaho's Fall atmosphere. I dream about it at night. I remember the smell randomly and sigh. It brings back lots of fond memories that I like to think about.

What I've been missing lately is picking Pine Nuts. Every Fall we packed into the old Dodge and my step-dad and my mom and the kids would go and pick pine nuts. It's a sticky balancing act mess but so much fun. Then you come home and bake them in the oven. So good. Yesterday I saw an old man on the side of the road selling them in his old beat up pickup truck. I alternated between crying and buying up the lot.

For the record I did neither, but it did make me smile.

So this Halloween there will be no costumes, but we're still going to spend time together and with the family which is one of my favorite things to do.

Continue

Direction

Lately I've been feeling so restless.

Like I need a new direction.

I'm not sure if that means that I should start up a project and invest a lot of time in it and see if that is what I need.
I don't know if it means I should kick up my exercise and exhaust myself that way.

Maybe it means I need to buy a whole new wardrobe. (I'm hoping it's the third)

I have just been feeling a change in the air and I'm not sure what to do yet.
I've been mulling it over and trying to decide what the best thing to do is.

I need some inspiration :)

Hopefully I'll find it soon. 

Continue

Juggling

I'm still trying to get a hold of this juggling business.

Juggling school, work and home life.

I currently have zero clean jeans nor underwear.

I have a test that I have to take on Saturday, that I MUST study for.

Month end for work just got over so I'm feeling a little frazzled.

I know it seems like I say this a lot but whew!

I don't mean to complain.
I love all of the aspects of my life, but seriously if I didn't have to look at the calendar everyday for work, pretty sure I would still be back in August.

I miss photography.

I miss taking pictures and having the time to edit them. I have 3 jobs that I have done that are still sitting in iPhoto, unedited and looking sad.

I need to make time to do that.

I want to work on the house. We have a complete disaster of a living room with boards and sheetrock and carpet, but we haven't had the time to complete it.

Plus our electrician is commuting from Idaho so that limits our work time. :)

Hopefully this weekend we'll start wrapping that up. Our goal is to have it done by Halloween.

RJ cringed and said it might possibly happen, but he's not holding his breath.

But, there's nothing I would change about life.

I might change how many hours of sleep I need a night so that I can get more done, but other than that I am happy.

Happy that I have a home to decorate and a husband that at least washes his own laundry :) [If he does it, the majority that are washed are his. It's a mystery to me why]

I'm happy that I have great family to fill up my time and to keep me laughing.

I'm grateful for a live in brother in law that loads our dishwasher almost every night even though he is just as busy as RJ and I and rarely uses any of the dishes.

I am thankful for my support system. I know I can count on so many people to help me through my stress and also do so much for me.

My mother in law text me yesterday because I wasn't able to make it to Girls Night Out.

This is what she wrote:

"Hi Charise, just wanted you to know that you'll be missed tonight. I'm so proud of you for going back to school. You're a wonderful daughter-in-law who I love very much!"

This makes all of my stress worth it. To know that I am loved and appreciated for what I do. I love my mother-in-law very much and she is so good to RJ and I.

She knew just what to say yesterday to make my entire day. :)

Continue

Mondays, Colds and My Fair Lady

We visited my parents in Idaho this weekend which turned out to be a blast. Of course I didn't bring my camera because I am a total airhead, but we had a great time. My mom cooked a delicious dinner and we celebrated her birthday with old fashioned Pepsi bottles and laughing around the kitchen table. My family makes me laugh so hard and it makes me miss the day to day life living with them. It was quite the weekend. We didn't end up leaving until midnight, arriving home at about 2 in the morning. Well worth the drive though.

This morning I woke up with a raging cold and a scratchy throat which is no fun. I came into work a little late, but I'm here and headed up to school after I get done so that I can continue hopefully getting good grades. I've got a test next week so hopefully I can get some good study time in tonight.

RJ is doing a side job tonight with one of his friends. I think it'll be good to do some manual labor and learn something new. :)

This week is going to be exciting and I am happy that fall is coming. Since my mom's birthday was yesterday, my sister bought all the girls in the family tickets to Hale Theatre's My Fair Lady. Every year we go to A Christmas Carol with the family, but this is going to be really fun with just the girls and going to see a show that I personally really like. I like going and getting a little bit of culture and fine arts in my life, instead of just watching new movies.

We're also putting a fireplace in our house which I'm soooo excited about. We have the fireplace and have some of the work done, but the next step is to put lighting into our living room so my dad is coming this weekend to install that and hopefully by the end of the month we'll have a remodelled living room that is nice and cozy with a fireplace. It's going to be a lot of work, but at least it'll feel like home and be a little bit more updated.

Saturday the family is also carving pumpkins and I'm going to make soup. I love fall and spending time with my family. I am going to anticipate the weekend all week, so hopefully it goes by fast. I'll post pictures up next week of the entire weekend.

Continue

Mom, Mom, Mamma, Ma...

A mother is she who can take the place of all others, but whose place no one else can take.
- Cardinal Mermillod

Today is my mom's birthday. I'm not even sure where to start on this post because there's so much to say. I have so much love and respect for my mom. She is a truly amazing lady and there's just not enough words to express all that I feel towards her. 

I have always wanted to be just like my mom. I remember helping her clean our house when I was four or five with a plastic vacuum. I would follow after her babbling on and on and I loved being close to her. 

I always wanted to be a dancer and a cheerleader just like her. I started gymnastics when I was in fifth grade and she would drive me to practice twice a week and stay the entire time. I know she had so much on her plate, but knowing she was there made me feel so good. She wanted to see me pursue my dreams. She let me bawl on her shoulder when I didn't make the high school drill team. She was there when I made my high school cheer squad. She spent numerous hours being my "hair model" and singing with me in the car. 

She teased me when I had my first kiss.

She was with me when I bought my wedding dress. She saw my face light up when I came out wearing a beautiful dress and told me that I had to buy that one.  

My mom has been such a large part of my life. She has been such a good friend to me and also a good example. She shows me that the only way to accomplish things is through hard work. She also is one of the most giving people I know. She has so much compassion for people and is willing to always go the extra mile to help someone out. 

My mom has been through a lot in her life. She has had many trials that I think she has overcome beautifully. She still has a smile on her face and a laugh nearby. 

Mom, I love you with all of my heart. 

Everyday with you is a blessing and I am proud to be your daughter. 

Thank you for all you have given me and taught me. 

Most of all, I love you. 

Love, Charise  

Continue

I Should Be Asleep, But I'm Listening to RJ Sleep Talk Instead...

RJ talks in his sleep. Non stop. Every night. It's hilarious the things he says. I always try to ask him about it and then he gets upset for teasing him. :) I love it. 

I am wiped out. Between school, work and trying to be a good wifey I am exhausted. In a good way though. I love going to school. I'm so glad that I'm going and I finally just took the plunge and went back. I love work. I love the people I work with and I enjoy going everyday and listening to the Dixie Chicks all day long. Thanks Mary :) 

I also love my husband. More than words can express. But all together these things have got me in quite the frenzy and I'm wondering where I fit into all of this. 

I haven't worked out in... weeks months! 

Scratch that, I did one, count it, ONE P90X workout last week and thought I was doing good, but the next day I was so sore that I wanted to curl up in a ball and die. If it didn't hurt so much. haha. 

I also don't think I've taken the time to fully look at myself in the mirror for a few months either so sorry to those that have to see my ragged ponytail and sub par makeup job everyday. 

But... there is a moral to this whine sesh. 

Even when I think things are stressful.

Even when there's days that I long for hot chocolate and my pajamas at 4 in the afternoon, 

there's always someone I can come home to and make me smile. Someone that will hug me and tell me that he's proud of my ambition. 

Someone that I can drive all the way to Moab and back with and not turn on the radio even one time. We can talk the whole way. 

I love talking to that kid. He makes me laugh, smile, cringe and blush all in one drive's time and I love every second of it. 

And as hard as it seems for me, I know that RJ is feeling it too. I would say he's missing out on home cooked meals but.... he cooks so.. he's well fed. But when he says he misses me at the end of the day I want to cuddle up next to him and whisper in his ear that I can't believe that I have the honor of calling him mine.

So I'm going to do just that.... 

Continue